It's not always about YOU. I lived with one of these http://www.mcafee.cc/Bin/sb.html for 17 years. Year 15 is when I thought I couldn't take it anymore and tried to check out. Looking back, I'm really glad I didn't succeed because . . .

Look at me now! A Girl Dog's Breakfast is published! It's available through the store at

Hey.
How's tricks?
Am dealing with crap.
Actually a crap-oid -- so not ME! Lui!
Will deal.
Will be back.

Not easy telling peeps you like to fuck off.
But if it's a choice between me and thee? (thee and they? thee and she? thee and he?)
There's only one answer because we are responsible for the body we got dished out with. It's our responsibility to protect it.
Easy for me to say because I'm older. Really cool thing on the news today (TV) where they showed that when elephants g

Poetry workshop today.

I'm a poet, but I was SO intimidated by the quality of the poets /poems today that I will never call myself a poet with a capital P. Ever.

Should I say intimidated? No. Not intimidated. In fact, I felt a little bit superior to the OCD weirdo who sat behind me. But I always feel superior to OCDs. My shrink of 1983-1986 told me to do, to be that. (Thanks, Dr Weldon!)

btw, the OCD weirdo behind me exposed herself to me -- damn, I'm good at reading people! I would say

Feeling kind of antsy, pissed off, restless, today.

So I wrote a poem:

Delights
You bring me
hand-picked treasures
you know will delight me
will divert my attention
from your intentions.

Did you learn this trick from
Mister Pisaura mirabilis
the spider who presents
his heart’s desire with
a silk-wrapped bug?
(c) April 2011, Christina Crowe

Always makes me feel better when I write something.

Been really pissed off lately. I have reasons, but it still makes me feel uncomfortable. Like there's something WRONG with me for getting annoyed with people who are acting like idiots. Or are treating me badly. Makes me feel guilty for being angry and this makes me feel bad. Sad. Depressed.

Suicide is hostility turned inward.

And this means that we suicidal peeps are actually really nice people, lovely people who wouldn't harm a fly, so we kill ourselves rather than kill somebody else when w

Circumventions

Not all, but a start ...

Stop with the booze.  Alcohol is a depressant.  You are suffering from depresSION.  Makes it worse.  Way worse.

What I was doing back in late 2003 was taking antidepressants but knocking myself out with 10 beer every evening between 5:30 and 10:30 pm.  I would just basically pass out.

But, oh, man.  Did I ever NEED to pass out though.  To just shut that mother the fuck up!&nbs

Spring arrived and already I'm thinking of the Summer Solstice (June 21 or so) which is when the days start to get shorter. Bummer, eh?

I shouldn't do that. I should just enjoy the remaining [*count, count, count*] 87 days until then. Wow. 87 out of the 365 we have available each year ... For six months (182.5 days) I'm kewl, and for 182.5 days, I'm not so kewl. And for about 36 days I'm fighting suicidal thoughts. Not bad when you look at it that way.

However ...

See how you can bring

My book, A Girl Dog's Breakfast, is at the editor's and at the printing estimator's. eeeeha! Talk about exciting!

It's: A collection of dark short stories and short light poems written as catharses. Christina’s abusive ex has not been treated kindly. She claims you’ll never spot him, so suggests you not bother trying. “Although,” she adds with a sly grin. “Any character with blue eyes is suspect.”

It will be available at the Crowe Creations

This will be my first official post.

I fucking hate Saint Patrick's Day which is coming up. I hate the schtoopud happy-happy-happy fucking music because I know it's bullshit. It's a smoke screen that hides the unbearable sadness and anger of the Irish people. I hate the party-party-party thing Saint Patrick's Day tries to project because I know so many Irish have so much they dare not think about or they'll implode with rage. Many live their lives drunk. How can you live a life when you aren't aware

Well here we are at last.